Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Earth Cookie

My friends and I pick on a certain member of our little group about having her "word for the week." Well I have one for this week. It's actually a phrase. My 'phrase for the week:' "Earth Cookie."

This wonderful word was given to me today by the recently-named "Distinguished Professor of History at Shepherd University" Dr. John E. Stealey, Ph. D. He explained, "Earth Cookie is the Morgan County [WV] name given to people who leave the DC suburbs and move into the region to 'live off the land.' They look and act like they have no money, but they end up owning half the town they live in. Also, they smoke a lot of marijuana." He continued (now I'll paraphrase, ' I guess it's a pretty lucrative business if you don't get caught. It lets you get what you want while looking like you live from the land.'

I thought it was probably the most hilarious thing the man has ever said, and also the most truthful. That is my new favorite word. It describes so accurately these weirdos who live in the 'cutsie-pie' (to use another Stealey term) villages of Northern Virginia and parts of the Panhandle of WV (especially Jefferson County, though also Berkeley, Morgan and to some extent Hampshire).

I had long been searching for a term to describe the transformed yuppie who moves from the Leesburg, Loudoun County area into the 'quaint villages' of western Virginia and eastern WV thereby abandoning (though they rarely do) the materialistic dog-eat-dog world of Northern Virginia in favor of earthly wonders of West Virginia. Earth Cookies come to West Virginia to get away from the pressure of the big city, but instead of doing that, they just bring the big city with them. They cause increase in housing prices. They open up little shops in Shepherdstown where they charge way to much for a cup of coffee and a cheese danish. They buy up all the land so no locals can afford anything. They dress in clothes that should have been discarded in 1972. They smell like they should have been disposed of 1972. These people are not West Virginians. Thank you, Dr. Stealey, for giving me this great word to describe the scourge of Jefferson County.


At 11:46 PM, Blogger Jillian said...

Yay. I was mentioned on The Vent Pipe....I knew my special words would get me somewhere, eventually.

I agree.....I don't like the way these "yuppies" or "earth cookies" are taking over either.

At 10:43 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I saw your blog and expected (hoped) for interesting comment by a conservative collegian. Instead, I read your "earth cookie" post and see addle brained musings about how "they cause" land and food prices to escalate. My suggestion for you Mr. Pseudo-conservative is to enroll in economics 101 and study-up on supply and demand. Follow that review with U.S. Census data from 2000 and more recent interim data. Once you're informed as to migration into the Eastern Panhandle and the median shift in house prices over the last five years, explain to all of us how those engaged in smoking marijuana are finding time and will-power to earn enough money to afford houses averaging $300k.

Or, have I completely misunderstood the type of conservativism you're advocating? Perhaps shades of a Nixonian price freeze in your psyche? If so, quit school now, as it won't do you any good, and go find a job in a command economy and then try writing a conservative blog!

At 1:21 PM, Blogger Jeff said...

Dear Anonymous,

If you had noticed, I said nothing about anybody smoking marijuana. I instead quoted somebody whom I found to be funny. Have you ever done that? Heard somebody say something that you thought was funny and then share it with others.

I'd also like to point out that it is not the 'natives' of the Panhandle who are building 300k+ houses--it is the move inners. Do you think that the average West Virginian can walk into a shop in Shepherdstown and buy a $85-100 handbag from one of the cutsie-pie stores? Certainly not! The folks who cross the river on their weekend voyage from Northern VA can, though, and they do.

(By the way, I wasn't advocating any type of conservatism--Nixonian, Reagonian, Bushonian or any otheronian--at all. I was just sharing a humorous quotation).


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